Weight Loss Help Videos
Latest videos by theonion
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Who Wants This Lady Doctor Dead? You may find it hard to believe, but when someone comes along with a great cure for illness or disease, some people in power get really, really ticked off. And that is what’s happened regarding the lady doctor above. Her name is Dr Suzanne Gudakunst, and she’s someone worth paying attention to. Why? ... Because she may have found the answer everyone’s been looking for when it comes to preventing sickness & disease, as well as a permanent end to people becoming fat! Dr Suzanne has correctly identified the exact causes of people’s obesity, and how to stop it. She’s also discovered that the same cause of why people get fat is also the same reason why people eventually get sick and die prematurely – often cutting off years from their lives (not to mention the quality of their lives!) She has identified several species of parasites and a specific type of goopy plaque that if left in your bowels makes you fat, bloated, developing a pouch and spare-tire belly – and which also is directly linked to 99.9% of ALL diseases (including but not limited to: cancers, diabetes, arthritis, heart disease, strokes, high blood pressure, just to name a few!) But best of all, Dr Suzanne has found an instant and natural remedy that flushes out these plaques and parasites for good. People using her formula often report sudden weight losses up to 100 lbs or more – and without changing a single thing about their diets. Also more shockingly is the fact that many people see reversals in heart disease, and suddenly their diabetes or even cancer goes into remission and never returns! Obviously this lady doctor is taking money away from the rich as she actually makes people well – rather than just keeping them sick, year after year, all just to profit at the expense of their health and eventually their very lives. If you’d like to find out more how her “Top Secret Fat Loss Secret” works and how you can get it (and before someone knocks her off for good!) then just click on banner below! ...
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The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass' Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 182 seconds Despite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions. Related: badass, capital, comedy, court, death, fake, funny, justice, law, news, penalty, punishment, satire, supreme |
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The Onion: 12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Offer To Give Breast Exams Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 178 seconds Two prospective Eagle Scouts explain how they are preventing breast cancer by helping women examine their breasts. Related: boy, breasts, children, comedy, funny, onion, scouts, teens, women |
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The Onion: Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 180 seconds Our morning show's political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper. Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, politics, satire, voting |
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The Onion: Disney Geneticists Debut New Child Stars Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 161 seconds Disney claims its latest batch of child stars is so lifelike, youll barely be able to tell they have no souls. Related: brothers, comedy, cyrus, disney, funny, hannah, jonas, miley, montana, onion, teens |
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The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 164 seconds Embarrassed Diebold officials apologized after one of their electronic voting machines prematurely revealed the winner of our upcoming sham election. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: 2008, election, machines, onion, the, voting |
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YouTube Contest Challenges Users To Make A 'Good' Video Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 152 seconds YouTube is offering a cash prize to the first user to upload a video with a shred of originality or artistic merit. Related: comedy, contest, fake, funny, news, onion, satire, youtube |
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Warcraft Sequel Lets You Play A Character Playing Warcraft Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 179 seconds World Of World Of Warcraft's amazing level of detail makes players feel like they are actually in a cramped, dark apartment playing World Of Warcraft. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: comedy, everquest, fake, funny, games, life, news, of, onion, online, pc, satire, second, warcraft, world |
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Voting Machines Elect One Of Their Own As President Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 195 seconds Voting machine DRE700 came out of nowhere to defeat Barack Obama and John McCain and become the first machine president. Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, florida, funny, john, machine, mccain, news, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire, voting |
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In The Know: Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized? Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 198 seconds Panelists discuss whether Halloween candy and costumes have distracted us from placating demons to ensure a bountiful harvest. Related: comedy, fake, funny, halloween, news, onion, satire |
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Attractive Girls Union Refuses To Talk With Mike Greenman Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 225 seconds At a press conference today, the AGU announced it will not even acknowledge Mike Greenman until he begins dressing better and loses some weight. Related: comedy, dating, fake, funny, news, onion, relationships, satire, teens, women |
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Bush Tours America To Survey Damage Caused By His Presidency Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 178 seconds President Bush will seek to comfort victims of his presidency as they try to make sense of the destruction he has caused. Related: administration, bush, cheney, comedy, fake, funny, george, katrina, news, onion, satire |
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The Onion: '9/11 Conspiracy Theories Ridiculous' - Al Qaeda Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 167 seconds An Al Qaeda representative says that claims the U.S. government was behind the attacks on Sept. 11th are demeaning to Al Qaeda. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: 911, al, bush, center, cheney, comedy, conspiracy, fake, news, onion, qaeda, satire, theory, trade, world |
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Poll: Bullshit Is Most Important Issue For 2008 Voters Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 145 seconds For a majority of likely voters, meaningless bullshit will be the most important factor in deciding who they will vote for in 2008. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: barack, clinton, election, hillary, john, mccain, obama, politics, president, voting |
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Obama Win Causes Obsessed Backers To See How Empty Lives Are Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 168 seconds The revelation that Obama's candidacy was the only thing that gave their lives any meaning has caused many supporters to wander aimlessly, unsure of what to do with themselves. Related: barack, comedy, election, funny, obama, onion, president, satire |
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Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate Threatens McCain's Base Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 186 seconds Experts predict that Joad Cressbeckler could tip the election to Obama by attracting people who want to vote for the most crotchety candidate possible. Related: 2008, barack, comedy, election, funny, john, mccain, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire |
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Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole? Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 125 seconds With the economy sliding deeper into a recession, panelists discuss whether it's time to stop throwing our money into a massive pit out in the desert. Related: bailout, business, comedy, fake, funny, money, news, onion, paulson, recession, satire |
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Pre-Game Coin Toss Makes Jaguars Realize Randomness Of Life Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 161 seconds After comprehending the capricious nature of fate, the Jaguars could not go through with the charade of playing a meaningless football game. Related: brady, comedy, football, funny, giants, jacksonville, jaguars, manning, onion, satire, superbowl, tom |
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The Onion: McCain Left On Campaign Bus Overnight Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 159 seconds Campaign officials downplayed the incident, saying the senator was fine as soon as he was fed and taken to the bathroom. Related: barack, comedy, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire |
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The Onion: Are We Giving Robots Too Much Power? Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 130 seconds Panelists discuss whether controversial decisions by the Robot Congress and President Executron indicate robots have too much control over our lives. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: 1984, government, onion, power, robots, technology |
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The Onion: Sources Warn Miley Cyrus Will Be Depleted by 2013 Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 148 seconds Unless Americans turn to alternative sources of entertainment, the 'Hannah Montana' star will soon be completely tapped out. Related: all, comedy, cyrus, fake, funny, hannah, miley, montana, news, official, onion, over, parody, satire, start, video |
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The Onion: Meteorologists Predict Worst Autumn Ever Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 132 seconds Experts advise that anyone venturing outdoors should be on the lookout for extremely crunchy leaves and winds as high as 12 mph. Related: comedy, disasters, fake, hurricane, natural, news, onion, satire, tornadao, weather |
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The Onion: Obama Runs Constructive Criticism Ad On McCain Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 183 seconds In response to Republican attacks, Barack Obama unleashed a series of slightly negative ads that gently point out how McCain could be doing a better job. Related: barack, comedy, funny, john, mccain, obama, onion, politics, satire |
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Portrayal Of Obama As Snob Hailed As Step Forward For Blacks Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 142 seconds Overjoyed civil rights leaders say that Barack Obama has paved the way for future black politicians to be smeared as country club snobs. Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, onion, politics, satire |
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The Onion: Volatile India-Pakistan Standoff In 11,680th Day Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 151 seconds The threat of nuclear war hangs over the region with no end in sight, just as it has for the past three decades. Related: bush, comedy, fake, funny, india, jihad, muslim, news, nuclear, onion, pakistan, satire, weapons |



























